Humor and SM

Years ago in another city I had a best friend/gay boy housemate who was telling me all about his slutty exploits at the bath houses. I loved it when he shared his naughty stories with me. He talked about the loop the men walk- a mini cruise around the perimeter of the place, where men surveyed each other and invited each other into their private rooms. One thing he told me is that no one ever smiles. It’s all very serious and mysterious. Just like the idea that men don’t want to hear laughter when they are fooling around. They can take it as a response to their lack of …ahem…..sizability and kill the moment.

I’ve seen this carry over in the kink world as well. But I have also seen many places where humor is welcomed and appreciated. Just visit any kink yahoo group and watch the puns and jokes and silly humor fly. Humor is used a lot in teaching kink-oriented classes as well. No shocker here- humor is a great tool. That’s one of the reasons I love the late Robert Davolt ’s book, Painfully Obvious. His sardonic humor often makes me laugh out loud.

Last Saturday I attended a Groundlings show. The Groundlings have a comedy company and school in LA. Their alumni populate the likes of Saturday Night Live and Mad TV. Fantastic comedians like Will Ferrell and Lisa Kudrow studied there. The show was damn funny. Every sketch was good. I am mentioning it here because there was a sketch that took place in a Goldrush era whorehouse. The customer coming in had a very elaborate fetish that he doubted any of the ladies could manage. I won’t give it away. But let me just say that even though it was absurd and over-the-top, I thought the Groundlings handled the subject with a goofy and sweet brand of respect. Kudos!

For the Margaret Cho fans, (she’s had great kinky bits in her act) she’s got a brand new film, Bam Bam and Celeste, that will debut at the AFI Film Festival and Fusion, Outfest’s LGBT People of Color Film Festival. It’s the headliner for the Closing Night Gala at Fusion. I’ll be there. With the proverbial bells on.